A New Life...Becoming an Army Wife....

I am an Army wife. My husband recently left for BCT (Basic Combat Training) to follow his dream of becoming a soldier. He researched as much as he could about what he would go through in the next 4 months. How hard they would work him, how they would break him down and build him back up. The army would teach him how to not to just be strong but Army strong. He will have to endure early mornings, physical strain on his body and mind that he has never experienced before. He will be yelled at and treated like he is nothing by drill sargents, he will learn how to depend on his fellow SIT's (Solders in Training) and learn how to be a team player like no other job has even taught him. He will be physically and mentally exhausted every day and will be cut off from everything he once knew, and will miss his family more than he ever realized. At times he will feel like he cant go on another day but his strength will carry him through because this is his dream and even when he has doubt he knows he can and will become a soldier of the United States Army. I can only imagine how hard BCT is and will continue to be for him.

But for me, his wife I have my own struggles of my husband being gone. When your husband is gone especially in BCT you have to rely on yourself, you can't rely on your husband like you always have in the past. My husband needs to focus on his training and cannot be stressed by what is happening at home. He needs to remain focused on his training so if the day comes when he has to go to war and fight for our country, he will be well trained and learn how to not only keep himself safe, but also his fellow comrades. So now it is my job to make sure our home runs smoothly, to make sure the kids are taken care of, and to handle everything on my own. Being an Army wife means learning to be independent! It means if the sink is clogged, the hot water heater breaks, or one of my children gets injured it is ME who has to know what to do. I have almost no contact with my husband and when I do write to him or hear his voice on the phone for those brief few minutes I have to be his strong soldier. I tell him we miss him and how proud we are of him but I do not tell him anything that could worry him, because he doesn't need anything else to worry about! With him gone I am now the Mother who does everything. I can't say ugh I don't feel like cooking, baby can you make dinner tonight? I cannot rely on him to help clean the house when I am exhausted because he isn't here. But being an army wife is more than just being the one who does everything. The army wife is also the one who misses her husband more than she ever has, the one who goes to bed alone, wakes up alone, and lives her life without the man she loves. I no longer can look forward to hearing all about my husbands day or crawling into bed with him and watching a movie. Instead I look forward to phone calls even if they only last a few minutes and I now stalk the mail man because letters are really the only way I can stay connected to my husband.